One more time it sucks being military

Don't get me wrong, I do find adventure in moving and exploring new areas the military wants me to see-or at least where they need my husband to be to accomplish a job. But some parts of living the military lifestyle really suck. Sorry if you are offended by my word choice, but really I know we all hear SO much worse coming from the flight-line etc. that you can probably think of a few more interesting words to substitute if you really feel the need. Anyhow, this weekend my father had a stroke. It was a very minor one, thank god, but being in small town New England the local hospital couldn't handle it so he was airlifted to a larger regional hospital several hours away. This was a good thing in many ways; the hospital is superior, the doctors and nurses are wonderful, the facility has all the latest equipment and he received excellent care. The downside? That left my mom to drive back and forth several hours everyday through the mountains while she is exhausted from lack of sleep, stressed from worry, and frustrated because, as much as I love him, my father is a bear to deal with when he is sick (again, feel free to substitute a more interesting flight-line type word for bear). So, why does it suck to be military? Well let's see; my father had a stroke and, since I live almost 2,000 miles away, I wasn't there. It would be nice to see him and judge the effects for myself, to show my support and bring him flowers to help cheer him up, but no... I live almost 2,000 miles away. Gee Dad hope you are feeling better, I'll call you! Mom is exhausted and could use someone to help her drive the hours there and back, but nope, I am almost 2,000 miles away. Gee Mom need someone to sit with Dad while you talk with doctors, or call work to handle what you are required to do? Call someone else Mom, 'cause I live almost 2,000 miles away. Oh Yay! Dad is coming home, but I can't go in and straighten up so they have a nice homecoming because I live almost 2,000 miles away. Over the next few days or weeks Mom will have to do all the housework, cooking, shopping etc while Dad recuperates. Can I help with any of this? Nope because, that's right, you guessed it! I live almost 2,000 miles away. Sometimes it really sucks to be living the military lifestyle.

Surprise deployment

Today is Wednesday. It is the Wednesday before Valentine's day and I have been having a very stressful couple of weeks. The baby has been sick for almost 2 weeks which means late night wake-up calls and nebulizer treatments. I have been late to work, late to sleep, and low on energy. I took both my classes on a field trip today which meant extra work collecting signatures and money, confirming with the bus, organizing name tags and contact information, preparing the materials for the trip, confirming with the site and of course buckling what feels like a thousand car seats over bulky winter coats that turn my little ones into the giant Stay-puff Marshmallow man from Ghost Busters. Well, maybe it was only 18 car seats, but it felt like a thousand. I had to prepare for having 2 substitutes and an unknown Teaching Intern to run my class tomorrow while my assistant and I attend a required training for a committee we are both on. I am organizing not one, but two Valentine's Day parties for my classes and volunteered to make treats for my daughter's class. I have written out dozens of Valentines for my children's classes and have a couple dozen more to do. I have cleaned a linen closet, painted a large bedroom with 10' high ceilings, brought a load of boxes to the storage unit, and bought packing materials to pack several more large items in later this weekend. I took my kids to multiple doctor appointments and got their medical paperwork ready for our move. I purchased both my husband's Valentine's gift and something for my son. I still need to swing by and pick up that jewelery box for my daughter. I have paid bills, and shopped online for my husband's birthday next week. I have done the vast majority of this while feeling like a single-mom since my husband has had long duty hours in preparation for and during the current inspection. And that right there is the key; I have felt like a single mom, but I have not been one. I have cuddled with my warm husband when the bed was cold at night. He helped get the baby ready and kept our daughter focused on the mornings he didn't have to go in early. He made it home in time for goodnight hugs and kisses even on the nights he worked late. He worked long hours, but he did come home.

Today is Wednesday. Today my friend found out her husband is deploying to Iraq for seven months, he leaves on Saturday. They have three days to prepare for seven months of separation. They need to gather his gear, buy supplies, prepare his uniforms, organize everything he is going to need for the next seven months, and pack his bags. They have to renew her power of attorney, be sure all ID's and required paperwork is up to date, and review his will. They have 3 days to prepare their children for Daddy leaving and not coming home again for seven months. He won't be home for Valentine's day, Easter, the school program in the spring, Pre-K graduation, 4th of July, summer vacation, the start of the next school year or Labor Day weekend. Today is Wednesday, he leaves on Saturday.

Suddenly the mountain of stress I felt I was under has shrunk to an ant hill in comparison. Today is Wednesday, he leaves on Saturday.

Thank god for snow days! Yesterday was a lovely frigid day with millions of tiny frozen rain drops pelting the earth causing school officials to cancel our day-yay!!!! Living in Texas this really doesn't happen often so I felt it was important for me to take advantage of this extra time and, well....hang out with my kids. To top it off it was also my baby's 3rd birthday! What a gift no daycare just a day with Mom, Dad and big sister hanging out, watching movies and making a cake.
I did manage to clear out several shelves in my bathroom linen closet while the kids napped yesterday afternoon. I would seriously like to know how we accumulated an entire trash bag FULL of expired lotions, old make-up, cough drops, and other miscellaneous junk. We have only lived here for 4 years and I KNOW I didn't move that much crap with us last time, so where did it all come from?? Oh, and did I mention I now have to find proper disposal for a shopping bag full of expired medications? I found the iron pills left over from after the baby was born as well as a full bottle of pills the doctor had prescribed for a headache that wouldn't go away while I had been pregnant (and yes the baby is three now- so you can see how often I clear out my medicine cabinet). How did we get so many bottles of pills? Are the pain relievers and Pepto-Bismo breeding in there? What kind of twisted medication would they produce? I am really very curious to know how normal civilians keep their closets clean when they don't have the threat of an impending move forcing them to clean-out at least once every few years. Dear God... What will I do when he retires and I can actually live in a house for 10 or 20 years? Will the closets be bursting from the pressure of Motrin bottles and dietary supplements? I can see the headlines now... Family killed, crushed by falling Colace!

Hi. I think I had better warn you that I have absolutely no idea what I am doing. I am not a writer, or a journalist. I do not play one on TV and I haven't even spent the night in a Holiday Inn anytime in the past few months.... so what am I doing? Well, quite possibly I am venting. Or maybe I can claim to be 'organizing my thoughts' while posting it all for the world to see. You see, I am one of the millions of military spouses in this country who is simply trying to raise my children, while working full time, oh... and randomly moving about the country in response to the military's needs. I love my husband, and I enjoy the adventure moving somewhere new can bring... but that doesn't mean moving is enjoyable or easy for me. The fact that I have lived in 6 states and am moving to #7 in a few months may sound like I should have it all together and I should already know just where to start. But the fact of the matter is; I don't. Sure I know I have to paint and clear out the house we are in so we can list it with the Realtors in a few weeks, but knowing that and getting it done are two different things. I also know I need to contact a realtor in our new state to help find a rental, but which one is trustworthy? Which one will gouge us for all of our housing allowance? We have to choose a town, a school district, and possibly a house all sight unseen. I have to try to find a job while living 2,000 miles from my future employer... and pray that I fall into a job that I will be happy in. hmmm- yup, that sounds easy doesn't it? So while I try to accomplish all of these things I feel the need to vent, er... 'organize my thoughts' , but most of my friends are locals and do not understand the military lifestyle. My military friends are just as busy and crazed as I am right now, and my husband has the stress of inspections, job changes and deployments and doesn't need added stress from my ven...er, 'organizing thoughts'. So... here I am world, venting anonymously to you. Don't say I didn't warn you!